Eric Revis' Dissonant Jazz

i meant to pick you up at the cafe, like you had asked
but here i am on the couch, drunk on your essence
your frustration isn't a manipulated reward to me
i get excited when you are

you remind me of a government mandated wet dream
suspiciously obvious in your beauty
profane in your innocence
but it's like they say
not all Slovenes bear facial hair
and if there were an objective truth to any of this it would be a video game

for JHH

i eulogize everything, wherever I go
and i had meant to put the music on and shed a tear for yours
but the pen was a capella and my memory didn't get there on its own
you died after two weeks of your allotted eight
in another universe i did it the right way and it was perfect
but that universe didn't have this you
i didn't either
but I miss you tragically, John

you weren't someone that i ever would have dared to mention these things to
but the world didn't stop for but a millisecond
and i feel to blame
because i spent my time in farther corners than yours
trying to find the tear in the sky in Macondo and Pianosa
and i couldn't do anything for you